Relationship Advice on Moods and Temperament 

 
Everyone has an occasional bad day. 

Sometimes you'll even have a bad week, bad month, or bad year.

But some people seem to have a bad life, and they want everyone else to know it. Their moods tell you all about it.

And then there are those people who seem endlessly happy and upbeat. Nothing ever bothers them, you know?

Well, "endlessly happy" and "chronically sad," along with lots of other moods in between, can be red flags in a relationship.

We'll cover many of them in this section.

Every relationship hits bumps. From time to time, there’s bound to be some miscommunication, disappointment and frustration.

And despite what we like to think, he won’t always be responsible for causing them.

We believe that how a man handles these situations reveals some of the most important things about his personality and character.

Ask yourself these questions. If the answer is “yes” to any of them, you need to know more about him.

If the answer is yes to all of them, head for the door.

Does he get road rage? We’re reminded here of what comedian George Carlin once said in a stand up routine.

“Anyone who drives slower than me is an idiot.

Anyone who drives faster than me is a maniac.”

We’ve all been frustrated by other drivers at times. But does he act on those frustrations?

Raising an occasional middle finger or spouting a few four-letter expletives doesn’t count. We’re talking about things like tailgating, pulling up beside the offender and shaking a fist, or rolling down a window and shouting.

Does his driving suddenly become dangerous because he’s more focused on showing his anger than watching the road?

This kind of behavior shows he may need some help with anger management.

And therefore, you may need to keep an eye on the exit.

Does he “fly off the handle?” This is basically road rage without the road.

Does he explode over trivialities?

Granted, we all have our own opinion of what’s trivial and what isn’t. But if you’re ten minutes late to meet him and he starts shouting at you, that, in our opinion, is flying off the handle.

And speaking of shouting…

Does he “hurricane?” We’re not sure who coined the term “hurricaning” in relation to anger, but we think it’s a good one.

A hurricane, obviously, is a storm with a lot of noise, wind and fury. If your Prince displays his royal pique by shouting, calling you names, hitting things like walls, and breaking dishware, then it may be a good idea for you to break the bond with him.

We understand that “venting” helps calm you down when you’re angry. But venting shouldn’t be an excuse to get violent.

Does he push or poke when he’s mad? It’s one thing to “get in someone’s face” when you’re angry. Most people do it, figuratively or literally, when they’re upset.

But we believe any physical contact during a “heated discussion” is downright bad.

We’re not just talking about slapping or punching. That’s obvious. We’re talking about grabbing, holding tightly or to the point of pain, shaking, pushing, or even poking an index finger in someone’s chest.

These things are beyond a simple violation of space. These represent the use of physical force, and we believe this kind of behavior is never healthy for a relationship.

We also believe that when these types of behaviors appear early, they often lead to a much more dangerous, higher level of physical force later.

Does he stay angry for a long time? There’s a funny line in an off-Broadway show called “Late Night Catechism,” which features an actress playing a stereotypical Irish Catholic nun.

During one part of the performance she says,

“When the Irish drink, we forget everything but the grudges…”

Conflict resolution is rarely easy, but it’s extremely difficult when one of the parties wants to stay angry.

You’ve probably heard someone describe such a person by saying,

“He’s not happy unless he’s mad.”

Sadly, we’ve come across far too many men like this (and of course, there are plenty of women too).

In our estimation, these types don’t make good long term partners.

Does he become sullen and uncommunicative when he’s upset? Once again, we touched on “the violence of silence” earlier.

People resolve their differences and understand each other’s point of view by talking.

If one or both persons won’t to talk, conflicts don’t get resolved and relationships get destroyed.

Does he show emotional extremes? Another way to ask this is, “Does he run very hot and very cold?”

People who get destructively angry, deeply sad, or gleefully giddy can be tough to live with.